Carmen Joanne Ablack
Working with PEOPLE, PROCESSES and RESOLUTIONS
Interpersonal mediation is an approach seeking to resolve conflict, rebuild communications and supporting people in conflict or relationship breakdown to find resolutions that are mutually agreed and workable for all parties involved in the mediation.
In mediation the individuals in difficulty are supported to find comprehensive and specific resolutions - this is done through the mediator offering guidance, encouragement, appropriate challenge and modelling more positive behaviour to help move beyond conflict to a more productive outcome.
As a mediator I am there to enable the process towards a good resolution for all parties involved whenever possible.
It is important to say that mediation does not always work. However the long history of using mediation processes shows us that in mediated conflicts once we have heard and understood each other respectfully, we are able to move on to finding elegant enough solutions and resolutions for ourselves.
The mediator's job, my job, is to help you find the elegant resolutions and to be able to move into a place of productive communication so you can get on with your lives, work, relationships etc.
As the mediator, I am an impartial third party. I am there to assist people to explore and understand their differences and to support the emergence of co-created resolutions where possible.
This is done through facilitated support and discussion and carries specific structures and formats that are equally applied to all involved. The key aspects of mediation are fairness in the approach of the mediator and the fact that the terms of agreement are designed by the people involved in the dispute, not by the mediator. This allows you to take ownership of the process and its outcomes. You dictate the terms of the agreement you come to, I do not.
Mediation specifically takes a "collective-responsibility" approach to finding the resolutions. Everyone involved in the conflict and its mediation collectively participates in defining the issues and co-creating the resolution through a specific and factual agreement about actions going forward.
In our personal and professional relationships on-going and hurtful conflicts are ultimately counter-productive and destructive.
Mediation allows us to look at the picture differently, to understand that the conflict is a source of information that can be understood and can allow us to find a step-by-step approach to resolution that is effective for all involved. My mediation services offer you a source of support, so you can move forward with a sense of ownership of the resolution and the knowledge that you have successfully managed to find effective and practical solutions to what might have at the outset seemed complex and insurmountable problems.
Personal and / or professional conflicts between individuals and in / across teams have a very high cost in terms of time, absenteeisms and stress. Our productivity / commitment suffers and we become less effective.
Whether a workplace or other setting, mediation offers the potential to cut the emotional and financial costs of conflict:
avoids costly adversarial processes;
fosters a sense of and understanding of dignity in the workplace or the personal relationship;
stimulates productive and healthy changes;
fosters creativity through successful resolution identification and agreement;
and finally mediation allows us to learn how to handle our disputes before they reach points of escalation.